I don't mean to be mean due to Guardiola's surprisingly good English given his complete lack of playing time in an English speaking nation. But his explanation of the infamous Barca-shirt-on-Fabregas incident after the World Cup is hilarious. Enjoy
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Ronaldinho Video Tribute
Ronadinho was back at the Camp Nou as a Milanista today, and the Blaugrana didn't disappoint with an absolutely brilliant video homage to the buck-toothed wonder. ¡Que homenaje!
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
EPL Power Rankings Week 2
I just did the recap, so here are the power ranking for week 2.
1. Chelsea Last week: 1
Well, they're the only team with 2 wins. They won both games 6-0. They have the most experienced squad of talented veterans in the league. They won it all last season. This was not a hard choice.
2. Tottenham Hotspur Last week: 5
It's early season, so these are very volatile rankings. It's really a composite of who looks best right now. Amazingly, only one team has won both of its games, so it's rather tough to judge on the rest of these. Spurs are a Joe Hart away from having taken both games, against City and at Stoke, which are both impressive fixtures. They've been menacing and free-flowing so far this season and while they may not have the pedigree, purely on performance I believe them to be deservedly in 2nd.
3. Manchester United Last week: 2
Only one dropped spot for the Red Devils and I still think most teams would rather play Spurs than them anyways. There's plenty of season left, but really all they've done is beat a bizarre Newcastle team and then slump to a draw at Fulham. They should have won there too to be fair. Never write them off though. Never write them off.
4. Manchester City Last week: 7
Well, they got a gutty draw against Spurs and then dismantled Liverpool. Definitely showing some signs of pedigree. Milner and Barry combined beautifully together, almost as if they had played with each other before....Sarcasm aside, they are starting to look scary. The team is rounding out. I can't wait to see them against the real big boys.
5. Arsenal Last week: 6
Sure, it was a spanking, but how much can you really go up on a home win against Blackpool. Certainly not more impressive than City, which is why Arsenal is here. Good to see them get their heads back on straight though, and if they can keep Cesc healthy, this team could really challenge.
6. Liverpool Last week: 4
I know what you're saying. 1 point from two games?! 17th in the table yet 6th in the rankings?! Look, it's still about who would you rather play. And until one of the midtable clubs starts knocking off teams above them as opposed to each other, I don't think anyone will fancy Liverpool before they face Birmingham or Bolton. Were they awful? Oh yes, but until they start dropping against teams like say, idk, WBA this weekend, we'll have to hold judgment.
7. Birmingham City Last week: 14
OK, so the listings are volatile. They finished top half last year, and after a great fightback and then a solid home win, they are just looking like the little engine that could all over again.
8. Newcastle United Last week: 18
This will almost assuredly be the biggest jump of the year. Getting killed at Old Trafford has happened to many great teams. So to follow that up with a slaughter of Villa back at home has to feel great. Who knows, maybe this team is for real. We just need more games to really see. But, one thing is for sure, no one wants to go to St James Park.
9. Bolton Wanderers Last week: 12
They should have gotten 3 last week, and they snuck in and took 3 this week. However the points come is fine. A comfortable win it shouldn't have been, but thats how it ended up, and while Burnley may never forgive Coyle he is doing fine with Bolton.
10. Everton Last week: 11
How do they go up despite a draw with Wolves? Well they were a far better team and based off of pure talent, they really shouldn't start falling down this list until they consistently start losing to these shitty teams. And then all bets are off.
11. Aston Villa Last week: 3
Speaking of which, nice Villa. Absolutely killed by a newly-promoted side. At least we know Villa will probably bring in a manager now as opposed to a caretaker. In terms of talent and fear value they probably deserve to be a bit higher, but my new rule is that if you lose 6-0 to a team not in Europe, it's going to take some work to get back into the top half.
12. Wolverhampton Wanderers Last week: 9
Sure, a nice draw. But I just can't endorse such negative football. Granted, I'll allow it at Goodison Park, but let's see how the rest of the season pans out.
13. Blackburn Rovers Last week: 10
Tough loss to Birmingham as they deserved a point, but I wouldn't really ring the alarm bells. Allardyce has midtable mediocrity down to a science.
14. Blackpool Last week: 8
I really had no idea where to put them. They beat the worst team in the league and got pantsed by one of the best. How good are they? No clue. I'm just giving them benefit of the doubt in case they are due in for many many more beatings this year.
15. Fulham Last week: 15
A valiant draw against United despite being outplayed. Combined with a rough opening day, another team that's hard to place.
16. West Bromwich Albion Last week: 19
No shame in getting killed at Stamford Bridge. A lot of credit for winning against Sunderland however. Many kudos for the Baggies and who knows maybe they might stay up for once.
17. Sunderland Last week: 17
Slumped to a gutless draw against Birmingham and then a sad defeat against WBA. Definitely needs some sort of spark as this is a talented team, but they are playing like shit.
18. Stoke City Last week: 16
A very tough loss against Tottenham, but 0 points is 0 points. I'm sure they'll shoot back up this list, but for the time being they're in the mire.
19. West Ham United Last week: 17
An absolute waste of talent and opportunities. I'm still stunned by that game. I have way less faith in them than Stoke and it wouldn't be the first talented but underachieving Hammers team to get relgated.
20. Wigan Athletic Last week: 20
0 points. -10 GD. 2 games. I think that's all that needs to be said.
1. Chelsea Last week: 1
Well, they're the only team with 2 wins. They won both games 6-0. They have the most experienced squad of talented veterans in the league. They won it all last season. This was not a hard choice.
2. Tottenham Hotspur Last week: 5
It's early season, so these are very volatile rankings. It's really a composite of who looks best right now. Amazingly, only one team has won both of its games, so it's rather tough to judge on the rest of these. Spurs are a Joe Hart away from having taken both games, against City and at Stoke, which are both impressive fixtures. They've been menacing and free-flowing so far this season and while they may not have the pedigree, purely on performance I believe them to be deservedly in 2nd.
3. Manchester United Last week: 2
Only one dropped spot for the Red Devils and I still think most teams would rather play Spurs than them anyways. There's plenty of season left, but really all they've done is beat a bizarre Newcastle team and then slump to a draw at Fulham. They should have won there too to be fair. Never write them off though. Never write them off.
4. Manchester City Last week: 7
Well, they got a gutty draw against Spurs and then dismantled Liverpool. Definitely showing some signs of pedigree. Milner and Barry combined beautifully together, almost as if they had played with each other before....Sarcasm aside, they are starting to look scary. The team is rounding out. I can't wait to see them against the real big boys.
5. Arsenal Last week: 6
Sure, it was a spanking, but how much can you really go up on a home win against Blackpool. Certainly not more impressive than City, which is why Arsenal is here. Good to see them get their heads back on straight though, and if they can keep Cesc healthy, this team could really challenge.
6. Liverpool Last week: 4
I know what you're saying. 1 point from two games?! 17th in the table yet 6th in the rankings?! Look, it's still about who would you rather play. And until one of the midtable clubs starts knocking off teams above them as opposed to each other, I don't think anyone will fancy Liverpool before they face Birmingham or Bolton. Were they awful? Oh yes, but until they start dropping against teams like say, idk, WBA this weekend, we'll have to hold judgment.
7. Birmingham City Last week: 14
OK, so the listings are volatile. They finished top half last year, and after a great fightback and then a solid home win, they are just looking like the little engine that could all over again.
8. Newcastle United Last week: 18
This will almost assuredly be the biggest jump of the year. Getting killed at Old Trafford has happened to many great teams. So to follow that up with a slaughter of Villa back at home has to feel great. Who knows, maybe this team is for real. We just need more games to really see. But, one thing is for sure, no one wants to go to St James Park.
9. Bolton Wanderers Last week: 12
They should have gotten 3 last week, and they snuck in and took 3 this week. However the points come is fine. A comfortable win it shouldn't have been, but thats how it ended up, and while Burnley may never forgive Coyle he is doing fine with Bolton.
10. Everton Last week: 11
How do they go up despite a draw with Wolves? Well they were a far better team and based off of pure talent, they really shouldn't start falling down this list until they consistently start losing to these shitty teams. And then all bets are off.
11. Aston Villa Last week: 3
Speaking of which, nice Villa. Absolutely killed by a newly-promoted side. At least we know Villa will probably bring in a manager now as opposed to a caretaker. In terms of talent and fear value they probably deserve to be a bit higher, but my new rule is that if you lose 6-0 to a team not in Europe, it's going to take some work to get back into the top half.
12. Wolverhampton Wanderers Last week: 9
Sure, a nice draw. But I just can't endorse such negative football. Granted, I'll allow it at Goodison Park, but let's see how the rest of the season pans out.
13. Blackburn Rovers Last week: 10
Tough loss to Birmingham as they deserved a point, but I wouldn't really ring the alarm bells. Allardyce has midtable mediocrity down to a science.
14. Blackpool Last week: 8
I really had no idea where to put them. They beat the worst team in the league and got pantsed by one of the best. How good are they? No clue. I'm just giving them benefit of the doubt in case they are due in for many many more beatings this year.
15. Fulham Last week: 15
A valiant draw against United despite being outplayed. Combined with a rough opening day, another team that's hard to place.
16. West Bromwich Albion Last week: 19
No shame in getting killed at Stamford Bridge. A lot of credit for winning against Sunderland however. Many kudos for the Baggies and who knows maybe they might stay up for once.
17. Sunderland Last week: 17
Slumped to a gutless draw against Birmingham and then a sad defeat against WBA. Definitely needs some sort of spark as this is a talented team, but they are playing like shit.
18. Stoke City Last week: 16
A very tough loss against Tottenham, but 0 points is 0 points. I'm sure they'll shoot back up this list, but for the time being they're in the mire.
19. West Ham United Last week: 17
An absolute waste of talent and opportunities. I'm still stunned by that game. I have way less faith in them than Stoke and it wouldn't be the first talented but underachieving Hammers team to get relgated.
20. Wigan Athletic Last week: 20
0 points. -10 GD. 2 games. I think that's all that needs to be said.
EPL: Week 2 Recap
Ok, so everybody does Power Rankings. Or so I've heard. Really just Marc Stein, but it's for the NBA, but he's a Man City fan so fuck him. Anyways, here's a new recap section I'm starting. Learn it. Love it.
The weekend on the whole showed that we know precious little about this season, as shock result after shock result materialized. The significance of each game truly remains to be seen, and take all the analysis with a grain of salt.
Arsenal 6 Blackpool 0
Well, an absolutely ass-hammering. Blackpool now knows that Wigan Athletic is very much not the standard fare of the Premier League. Remember when Arsenal played Barcelona and it was Barcelona versus Barcelona Light? This was Arsenal versus Retarded Arsenal. Arsenal was typically not clinical in front of goal but with so many chances, of course they're going to get 6.
What it means:
Well, it's par for the course for Arsenal. It means nothing other than no points were lost and they padded their goal differential. It does show that Blackpool was simply beating up on the single least-inspired professional team in the world last week, and are most likely going to lose a lot of games this season.
Birmingham 2 Blackburn Rovers 1
Ben Foster had a blinder and Birmingham deservedly won. It was pretty close, and both teams showed that they everything they need to be pillars of mediocrity this season.
What it means:
Not much to report on here, as early season football in the midtable rarely has. I would say Foster could do wonders to restore his reputation. Not everyone succeeds by being thrown into the pressure cooker of Old Trafford with little experience, and Birmingham made Hart a winner, maybe it can do the same with Foster. Onto the clubs, well 3 points for Birmingham is all that really matters.
Everton 1 Wolverhampton 1
Ugh. Everton. What a cocktease. So much talent, and so many second half surges, but why on Earth can they not pick up points before Christmas? Wolves at home should be an easy game for a club with Europa aspirations, and it was to be fair. Wolves were very negative and it was all Everton, but you have to put a few goals in to assure the points if they score on a break. That's why Chelsea slaughters teams. They know not to waste chances and to pile it on. Sounds unfair, but so is Wolves getting a point from this game.
What it means:
Well, it's very early for any real discussion of points, but Wolves already have 4 and Everton have already dropped 5. Everton should really have had 6 points by now, considering their schedule. If they drop too many more, they can lock themselves out of Europa. It sounds ridiculous but there is literally too much talent up top to let themselves slowly warm up again.
Stoke City 1 Tottenham Hotspur 2
Tough luck for Stoke on the Foy strike, and a rather even game otherwise. Brilliant for Tottenham, as we all know how tough it is to get the 3 points at the Britannia. Stoke played great however, and deserved a point.
What it means:
Taking care of tricky fixtures are where positions are won and lost, and so this is a great start for Spurs. Stoke were unlucky but they seem to have the pedigree to not sweat one loss at home now. They are on 0 points after two games, which is always distressing, but in a league with Blackpool, WBA and Wigan, they should feel safe.
WBA 1 Sunderland 0
Speaking of West Brom, how the fuck did this happen?! They didn't just win; they were a better team. Great stuff. Positive football paid off for them, but where exactly is Sunderland right now? Kenwyne Jones can't be that good can he?
What it means
I don't know if Sunderland has progressed from "staying up and midtable" to Europa for expectations, but like Everton, 1 point from 2 matches is not the way to do it. Poor showing against the Baggies. But as always, vital vital points for West Brom, who will undoubtedly be in the thick of the relegation battle.
West Ham United 1 Bolton Wanderers 3
Classic West Ham. Absolutely dominate the first half, get a penalty and bombard Bolton and still somehow go into the break 0-0. A bad break (Upson OG) and before you can say Elmander, you lose 3 1. West Ham were much better in the first half and deserved a couple scores but nothing went in. Bolton capitalized on defensive errors and waltzed away with 3 points.
What it means
This game was most important for Avram Grant. He is an underrated manager and I was happy to see him get the job, but they have Manchester United and Chelsea as their next two fixtures, and with him presumably staring at 0 points from 4 games come that time, the vultures may start circling. It'd be grossly unfair, but that's football. West ham should have enough talent to not worry about relegation, but with them you never know. Classy start thusfar by Bolton though.
Wigan Athletic 0 Chelsea 6
Most predictable result of the weekend. Wigan suck. Chelsea kills shitty teams with no mistake. OK I guess that sums it up.
What it means
Surely Wigan didn't expect much, but the absolute hammering they're getting week in and week out has to be psychologically damaging and this team looks like they want to call it a year already. The clock has to start ticking on Martinez if this keeps up. But hey Chelsea, way to take care of business.
Newcastle United 6 Aston Villa 0
And now to the least predictable result. Aston Villa were much better until Newcastle scored...12 minutes in. Carew had a god awful penalty, but really, how on Earth did this happen? An absolute mauling. Villa looked completely sunk. I'm still in shock on how this happened.
What it means
I honestly don't know. Is Newcastle halfway decent or is Aston Villa halfway horrendous? Newcastle has the shameless 3-0 beating at Old Trafford and Villa had the impressive win against West Ham, which was unfortunately only against West Ham. This game is the start of a very incomplete sample or a complete anomaly. I have no fucking idea.
Fulham 2 Manchester United 2
How do they do it? Year after year, Craven Cottage is a house of horrors for the Red Devils. United should have won, but valiant Fulham held on with a great PK save and a header that has been described as "towering" by every news outlet. It's a shame Dempsey was taken off so early, as he appears to not be impressing Hughes too much.
What it means
I wouldn't read too much into it. Solid result for Sparky, and one to build on, and lost points for United, but it probably will just mean Nani won't take a PK again for a loooooong time.
Manchester City 3 Liverpool 0
Ugh. Ugly. Ugly. Ugly. City were much better all game. And Adam Johnson is a cunt. Absolutely. He is a diver and a whiner. I went from ambivalent to anathema in about...30 minutes. Was part of it because he was absolutely murdering us? Yes....but he's still a cunt.
What it means
Exactly what you think it means. Until otherwise notified, Liverpool is not Champions League caliber. Manchester City is getting there, but no, unless it is shown to the contrary, Liverpool is a upper-midtable club.
The weekend on the whole showed that we know precious little about this season, as shock result after shock result materialized. The significance of each game truly remains to be seen, and take all the analysis with a grain of salt.
Arsenal 6 Blackpool 0
Well, an absolutely ass-hammering. Blackpool now knows that Wigan Athletic is very much not the standard fare of the Premier League. Remember when Arsenal played Barcelona and it was Barcelona versus Barcelona Light? This was Arsenal versus Retarded Arsenal. Arsenal was typically not clinical in front of goal but with so many chances, of course they're going to get 6.
What it means:
Well, it's par for the course for Arsenal. It means nothing other than no points were lost and they padded their goal differential. It does show that Blackpool was simply beating up on the single least-inspired professional team in the world last week, and are most likely going to lose a lot of games this season.
Birmingham 2 Blackburn Rovers 1
Ben Foster had a blinder and Birmingham deservedly won. It was pretty close, and both teams showed that they everything they need to be pillars of mediocrity this season.
What it means:
Not much to report on here, as early season football in the midtable rarely has. I would say Foster could do wonders to restore his reputation. Not everyone succeeds by being thrown into the pressure cooker of Old Trafford with little experience, and Birmingham made Hart a winner, maybe it can do the same with Foster. Onto the clubs, well 3 points for Birmingham is all that really matters.
Everton 1 Wolverhampton 1
Ugh. Everton. What a cocktease. So much talent, and so many second half surges, but why on Earth can they not pick up points before Christmas? Wolves at home should be an easy game for a club with Europa aspirations, and it was to be fair. Wolves were very negative and it was all Everton, but you have to put a few goals in to assure the points if they score on a break. That's why Chelsea slaughters teams. They know not to waste chances and to pile it on. Sounds unfair, but so is Wolves getting a point from this game.
What it means:
Well, it's very early for any real discussion of points, but Wolves already have 4 and Everton have already dropped 5. Everton should really have had 6 points by now, considering their schedule. If they drop too many more, they can lock themselves out of Europa. It sounds ridiculous but there is literally too much talent up top to let themselves slowly warm up again.
Stoke City 1 Tottenham Hotspur 2
Tough luck for Stoke on the Foy strike, and a rather even game otherwise. Brilliant for Tottenham, as we all know how tough it is to get the 3 points at the Britannia. Stoke played great however, and deserved a point.
What it means:
Taking care of tricky fixtures are where positions are won and lost, and so this is a great start for Spurs. Stoke were unlucky but they seem to have the pedigree to not sweat one loss at home now. They are on 0 points after two games, which is always distressing, but in a league with Blackpool, WBA and Wigan, they should feel safe.
WBA 1 Sunderland 0
Speaking of West Brom, how the fuck did this happen?! They didn't just win; they were a better team. Great stuff. Positive football paid off for them, but where exactly is Sunderland right now? Kenwyne Jones can't be that good can he?
What it means
I don't know if Sunderland has progressed from "staying up and midtable" to Europa for expectations, but like Everton, 1 point from 2 matches is not the way to do it. Poor showing against the Baggies. But as always, vital vital points for West Brom, who will undoubtedly be in the thick of the relegation battle.
West Ham United 1 Bolton Wanderers 3
Classic West Ham. Absolutely dominate the first half, get a penalty and bombard Bolton and still somehow go into the break 0-0. A bad break (Upson OG) and before you can say Elmander, you lose 3 1. West Ham were much better in the first half and deserved a couple scores but nothing went in. Bolton capitalized on defensive errors and waltzed away with 3 points.
What it means
This game was most important for Avram Grant. He is an underrated manager and I was happy to see him get the job, but they have Manchester United and Chelsea as their next two fixtures, and with him presumably staring at 0 points from 4 games come that time, the vultures may start circling. It'd be grossly unfair, but that's football. West ham should have enough talent to not worry about relegation, but with them you never know. Classy start thusfar by Bolton though.
Wigan Athletic 0 Chelsea 6
Most predictable result of the weekend. Wigan suck. Chelsea kills shitty teams with no mistake. OK I guess that sums it up.
What it means
Surely Wigan didn't expect much, but the absolute hammering they're getting week in and week out has to be psychologically damaging and this team looks like they want to call it a year already. The clock has to start ticking on Martinez if this keeps up. But hey Chelsea, way to take care of business.
Newcastle United 6 Aston Villa 0
And now to the least predictable result. Aston Villa were much better until Newcastle scored...12 minutes in. Carew had a god awful penalty, but really, how on Earth did this happen? An absolute mauling. Villa looked completely sunk. I'm still in shock on how this happened.
What it means
I honestly don't know. Is Newcastle halfway decent or is Aston Villa halfway horrendous? Newcastle has the shameless 3-0 beating at Old Trafford and Villa had the impressive win against West Ham, which was unfortunately only against West Ham. This game is the start of a very incomplete sample or a complete anomaly. I have no fucking idea.
Fulham 2 Manchester United 2
How do they do it? Year after year, Craven Cottage is a house of horrors for the Red Devils. United should have won, but valiant Fulham held on with a great PK save and a header that has been described as "towering" by every news outlet. It's a shame Dempsey was taken off so early, as he appears to not be impressing Hughes too much.
What it means
I wouldn't read too much into it. Solid result for Sparky, and one to build on, and lost points for United, but it probably will just mean Nani won't take a PK again for a loooooong time.
Manchester City 3 Liverpool 0
Ugh. Ugly. Ugly. Ugly. City were much better all game. And Adam Johnson is a cunt. Absolutely. He is a diver and a whiner. I went from ambivalent to anathema in about...30 minutes. Was part of it because he was absolutely murdering us? Yes....but he's still a cunt.
What it means
Exactly what you think it means. Until otherwise notified, Liverpool is not Champions League caliber. Manchester City is getting there, but no, unless it is shown to the contrary, Liverpool is a upper-midtable club.
Monday, August 16, 2010
EPL Power Rankings: Week 1
Alright I didn't actually do a preliminary rankings because I forgot, but this is fine, as I can just start it up with the first week of action. Disclaimer: squad strength is a factor right now, so Blackpool will NOT be 2nd in rankings due to the second best result of the week. I look at Power Rankings of "who is the last team you want to face right now." So, without further ado, here is the first week.
1. Chelsea
This shouldn't be too surprising. A 6-0 home thrashing of the baggies and the reigning champions. Nobody beats up on bad teams better.
2. Manchester United
Just finished up their whooping of Newcastle, and while the rest of the Champions League contenders had tougher matches, you have to look at the strength of their performance, and they'll fall soon enough if they aren't up to snuff.
3. Aston Villa
Obviously a generous ranking, and with the imminent loss of Milner, it remains to be seen how they can stay up here. But a highly impressive performance in light of tough circumstances. I doubt they'll stay up here though.
4. Liverpool
This is a bit of a toss-up between Spurs, but Liverpool I felt were more impressive given the circumstances. Outside of a Reina gaff, a 10-men side would have prevailed despite the Anfield chaos. Encouraging start.
5. Tottenham Hotspur
Really should have won, I don't know how they bottled it. Clearly the superior team, but Joe Hart was too good. The team lacks an undeniably world-beater player and maybe that will be their downfall. No individual could provide the necessary spark.
6. Arsenal
Weak display at Anfield, but a tough match to really judge on. No Fabregas, and facing a team looking to impress. They were gifted a draw, but wouldn't be too much lower regardless due to their quality.
7. Manchester City
Despite the talent, the Citizens were thoroughly outplayed by Spurs. The real question is whether they can really create a good enough squad without CL football to actually GET to CL football. A team full of talented castoffs from other CL teams will have to do, and it may be just a matter of time, but this team isn't instilling fear right now.
8. Blackpool
See! I'd put them in eventually. Look, unless they knock off a top contender, I can't honestly put them above them. But if we're in the "best of the rest" category, a 4-0 away pummeling of Wigan is a nice way to say hello the Premier League. We have seen Hull and Burnley both hit huge highs and then quickly flee the Premier League in the past, and "shoestring" budgets tend to be ill-fated. But for one week, Blackpool is on top of the world.
9. Wolverhampton Wanderers
Another surprise top half player! A solid and deserved win over a notoriously tough Stoke side is always a ticket to survival, and considering half the teams, teams like wolves, are just trying to survive the year, well done.
10. Blackburn Rovers
Another goalie gaff, but well-played by Blackburn to hold onto the game afterward. My vitriol for Allardyce withstanding, it was a solid match for Rovers, and one that will inevitably catapult them to a mid-table finish.
11. Everton
The highest spot for a losing team, Everton has a very talented squad that is notoriously slow-starting. If they ever want to truly compete, David Moyes has to figure out to get his team more engaged in the first half of the season instead of becoming a constant second-half surge.
12. Bolton Wanderers
They were clearly the better team against the Cottagers, and they were unlucky not to get all the points. Stu Holden had a great showing, and is doing wonders for repairing his reputation in England.
13. Sunderland
Absolutely collapsed when left with ten men, they'll get the nod over their rivals for being the better team when on equal footing. Despite that, their absolutely melt-down after the red card is worrisome.
14. Birmingham
Last year's Cinderella top-half finisher had a great fightback to take a point at the Stadium of Light, but they were definitely the worse team for the majority of the contest. Will Paul Robinson be able to fill Joe Hart's shoes? Not likely.
15. Fulham
A rather dull first match for Sparky, and very little to say about Fulham's performance. Other than, why didn't you start Dempsey?
16. Stoke City
Now, it is unfair for Stoke as they started the season away from their fabled Britannia stadium, but they were soundly beaten by Wolves. Wolves! That's bad enough, but for their sake they have to hope Kenwyne Jones is ok.
17. West Ham United
Solidly dismantled by Villa, West Ham have always been underachievers. They have plenty of talent, but this team cannot keep it together. It'll probably be another relegation dogfight in which they scrap to 15th again.
18. Newcastle United
Never easy to start the season at Old Trafford, and the Magpies showed why. They were wrecked on the first game back, and they'll have to show a lot more fight if they want to stay up.
19. West Bromwich Albion
Sometimes, you just know. WBA is going to get rocked a lot this season. This isn't the first, though it'll be one of the worst. Their defending is bad and they can't score. Bad combo.
20. Wigan Athletic
Wow. I mean WOW. To be fair, they should have not lost 4-0. They should have lost 8-1 (they did have that one disallowed goal...). They were SLAUGHTERED from the getgo. I couldn't believe it. It was a train wreck. It was absolutely unbelievable how badly they played, and Kirkland may not be able to goalkeep at this level anymore, as that was a horror show that Ben Foster couldn't watch. Wow Wigan. Wow.
1. Chelsea
This shouldn't be too surprising. A 6-0 home thrashing of the baggies and the reigning champions. Nobody beats up on bad teams better.
2. Manchester United
Just finished up their whooping of Newcastle, and while the rest of the Champions League contenders had tougher matches, you have to look at the strength of their performance, and they'll fall soon enough if they aren't up to snuff.
3. Aston Villa
Obviously a generous ranking, and with the imminent loss of Milner, it remains to be seen how they can stay up here. But a highly impressive performance in light of tough circumstances. I doubt they'll stay up here though.
4. Liverpool
This is a bit of a toss-up between Spurs, but Liverpool I felt were more impressive given the circumstances. Outside of a Reina gaff, a 10-men side would have prevailed despite the Anfield chaos. Encouraging start.
5. Tottenham Hotspur
Really should have won, I don't know how they bottled it. Clearly the superior team, but Joe Hart was too good. The team lacks an undeniably world-beater player and maybe that will be their downfall. No individual could provide the necessary spark.
6. Arsenal
Weak display at Anfield, but a tough match to really judge on. No Fabregas, and facing a team looking to impress. They were gifted a draw, but wouldn't be too much lower regardless due to their quality.
7. Manchester City
Despite the talent, the Citizens were thoroughly outplayed by Spurs. The real question is whether they can really create a good enough squad without CL football to actually GET to CL football. A team full of talented castoffs from other CL teams will have to do, and it may be just a matter of time, but this team isn't instilling fear right now.
8. Blackpool
See! I'd put them in eventually. Look, unless they knock off a top contender, I can't honestly put them above them. But if we're in the "best of the rest" category, a 4-0 away pummeling of Wigan is a nice way to say hello the Premier League. We have seen Hull and Burnley both hit huge highs and then quickly flee the Premier League in the past, and "shoestring" budgets tend to be ill-fated. But for one week, Blackpool is on top of the world.
9. Wolverhampton Wanderers
Another surprise top half player! A solid and deserved win over a notoriously tough Stoke side is always a ticket to survival, and considering half the teams, teams like wolves, are just trying to survive the year, well done.
10. Blackburn Rovers
Another goalie gaff, but well-played by Blackburn to hold onto the game afterward. My vitriol for Allardyce withstanding, it was a solid match for Rovers, and one that will inevitably catapult them to a mid-table finish.
11. Everton
The highest spot for a losing team, Everton has a very talented squad that is notoriously slow-starting. If they ever want to truly compete, David Moyes has to figure out to get his team more engaged in the first half of the season instead of becoming a constant second-half surge.
12. Bolton Wanderers
They were clearly the better team against the Cottagers, and they were unlucky not to get all the points. Stu Holden had a great showing, and is doing wonders for repairing his reputation in England.
13. Sunderland
Absolutely collapsed when left with ten men, they'll get the nod over their rivals for being the better team when on equal footing. Despite that, their absolutely melt-down after the red card is worrisome.
14. Birmingham
Last year's Cinderella top-half finisher had a great fightback to take a point at the Stadium of Light, but they were definitely the worse team for the majority of the contest. Will Paul Robinson be able to fill Joe Hart's shoes? Not likely.
15. Fulham
A rather dull first match for Sparky, and very little to say about Fulham's performance. Other than, why didn't you start Dempsey?
16. Stoke City
Now, it is unfair for Stoke as they started the season away from their fabled Britannia stadium, but they were soundly beaten by Wolves. Wolves! That's bad enough, but for their sake they have to hope Kenwyne Jones is ok.
17. West Ham United
Solidly dismantled by Villa, West Ham have always been underachievers. They have plenty of talent, but this team cannot keep it together. It'll probably be another relegation dogfight in which they scrap to 15th again.
18. Newcastle United
Never easy to start the season at Old Trafford, and the Magpies showed why. They were wrecked on the first game back, and they'll have to show a lot more fight if they want to stay up.
19. West Bromwich Albion
Sometimes, you just know. WBA is going to get rocked a lot this season. This isn't the first, though it'll be one of the worst. Their defending is bad and they can't score. Bad combo.
20. Wigan Athletic
Wow. I mean WOW. To be fair, they should have not lost 4-0. They should have lost 8-1 (they did have that one disallowed goal...). They were SLAUGHTERED from the getgo. I couldn't believe it. It was a train wreck. It was absolutely unbelievable how badly they played, and Kirkland may not be able to goalkeep at this level anymore, as that was a horror show that Ben Foster couldn't watch. Wow Wigan. Wow.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Young Player Watch: Dani Pacheco
Dani Pacheco Liverpool
Dani Pacheco Lobato is just another in the long line of talent streaming out of la cantera of Barcelona. Though, like many, he isn't not actually Catalan, but instead Andalusian. He was poach--err signed from Malaga to Barcelona, and in turn was poached by the scousers. As a player, the Liverpool first-teamer he has most in common with would be...Joe Cole. He's a short, quick player who likes to use trickery to make space and likes to operate behind the striker. These players are a dime-a-dozen in La Liga, but not to the same degree in the Premiership. To be honest, I was a bit surprised he didn't have more playing time this past year, considering the injury woes and the fact that he really should have been ready to make the leap up to the first team, especially considering the alternatives in the team and his performances in reserves, friendlies and with the Spanish U-19 side. Benitez, while I do not want to detract from all the good he did at Liverpool, had a horror show final season, and not developing Pacheco last year was probably a mistake from both a short and long term perspective. No matter, as he is just 19 and will hopefully feature this coming year.
YouTube Evidence
Haiku
Dani Pacheco
Fernando Torres except
Has working hamstrings
Season Expectations
Hodgson has never been afraid to take risks on players, and Pacheco has shown himself to be of the top quality. He is still very young, and plays behind a very talented (but historically very crocked) attacking group, which could lead him into competition against David Ngog. Not the world's most daunting task. If Liverpool stay healthy all year, probably only some cup action but if the injury bug plagues Anfield, expect a call for Pacheco.
Dani Pacheco Lobato is just another in the long line of talent streaming out of la cantera of Barcelona. Though, like many, he isn't not actually Catalan, but instead Andalusian. He was poach--err signed from Malaga to Barcelona, and in turn was poached by the scousers. As a player, the Liverpool first-teamer he has most in common with would be...Joe Cole. He's a short, quick player who likes to use trickery to make space and likes to operate behind the striker. These players are a dime-a-dozen in La Liga, but not to the same degree in the Premiership. To be honest, I was a bit surprised he didn't have more playing time this past year, considering the injury woes and the fact that he really should have been ready to make the leap up to the first team, especially considering the alternatives in the team and his performances in reserves, friendlies and with the Spanish U-19 side. Benitez, while I do not want to detract from all the good he did at Liverpool, had a horror show final season, and not developing Pacheco last year was probably a mistake from both a short and long term perspective. No matter, as he is just 19 and will hopefully feature this coming year.
YouTube Evidence
Haiku
Dani Pacheco
Fernando Torres except
Has working hamstrings
Season Expectations
Hodgson has never been afraid to take risks on players, and Pacheco has shown himself to be of the top quality. He is still very young, and plays behind a very talented (but historically very crocked) attacking group, which could lead him into competition against David Ngog. Not the world's most daunting task. If Liverpool stay healthy all year, probably only some cup action but if the injury bug plagues Anfield, expect a call for Pacheco.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Young Player Watch: Javier "Chicharito" Hernandez
The season is nearly upon us, as the Charity Shield is this coming Sunday! Excitement all around. Ligue 1 starts this week, the Premiership the week after and then a couple weeks later we get La Liga and Serie A. Do remind me how Spain and Italy start so much later and have a winter break to boot? What do they do with all that free time?
Anyways, big-name transfers are always overly-analyzed, where really young players stepping up is what teams are built on. If you aren't Chelski or the Middle Eastlands, you normally can't buy your way to contender, you have to build it. And really, is there anything more satisfying than seeing a talented youngster put it all together? Now, instead of a massive list that comes out in a week, I'm going to do one player at a time. Today's Edition: Chicharito
Javier "Chicharito" Hernandez Manchester United
Baby-faced is a bit of an understatement for the little pea. For those who are curious, Chicharito is so-named as his father, another footballer, was Chicharo for his green eyes. Continuing on with his play, this isn't nearly as sexy a pick as it would have been in say, I don't know, May? Chicharito had a fantastic World Cup and scored two great goals. He was found to be statistically the fastest player in the tournament, reaching a speed of 32.15km/hr, which is, if you're curious, the same top speed as a black mamba snake and a road runner.
One in the same
For some more gory details, here you go:
Backstory:
As I previously mentioned, Chicharito is a play off of his father's nickname. The little pea comes quite the distinguished footballing heritage, with a grandfather and a father who both played professionally. And his maternal grandfather, making him 100% genetically destined for greatness. Tomás Balcázar, his grandfather, was a member of the legendary Guadalajara team that 8 out of 10 titles in the mid-50s to 60s and represented Mexico internationally. His father, Chicharo, or Javier Hernández Gutiérrez by more formal definitions, was his reserve side manager at Guadalajara, and actually quit this past summer when denied leave to watch his son at the World Cup. Anyways, Chicharo was capped 28 times for Mexico and played at the 1986 World Cup and had a distinguished career in Mexican football, most notably for Tecos.
Oh I'm sorry, I forgot to mention the actual young player didn't I?
Without much further ado, he is a product of the club of his grandfather (Guadalajara for those without good attention spans) and has played there for his entire career prior to the Mancs. He moved his way up the ranks, jumping from the lower division teams up to the big leagues. He missed out on the Mexico U17 Team that won the 2005 U17 World Cup due to injury but was in Canada for the U20 World Cup where Mexico...did not medal. Sorry I have to get my digs in. Anyways, his goalscoring record in Mexico was pretty suspect until the last couple of years (rather expected for his age) and finished joint-third top in the 2009 Apertura and is (still) leading the current Bicentenario with 10 goals in 11 appearances. His scoring record for the senior team is formidable, with 9 goals in his 16 appearances.
YouTube Evidence
Haiku
Baby-faced striker
Soon to replace CR7
As eyebrow model
Probable Role
Striker depth isn't great at the Field of Dreams lately, particularly with the lack of support for Berbatov. If Berba can't turn it around early this year, expect Chicharito to get his fair share of chances, particularly in the early-round cup ties and relegation-fodder EPL matches. If he can prove as prolific there, expect him to supplant Berbatov in the hearts and minds of Mancs by season's end.
Anyways, big-name transfers are always overly-analyzed, where really young players stepping up is what teams are built on. If you aren't Chelski or the Middle Eastlands, you normally can't buy your way to contender, you have to build it. And really, is there anything more satisfying than seeing a talented youngster put it all together? Now, instead of a massive list that comes out in a week, I'm going to do one player at a time. Today's Edition: Chicharito
Javier "Chicharito" Hernandez Manchester United
Baby-faced is a bit of an understatement for the little pea. For those who are curious, Chicharito is so-named as his father, another footballer, was Chicharo for his green eyes. Continuing on with his play, this isn't nearly as sexy a pick as it would have been in say, I don't know, May? Chicharito had a fantastic World Cup and scored two great goals. He was found to be statistically the fastest player in the tournament, reaching a speed of 32.15km/hr, which is, if you're curious, the same top speed as a black mamba snake and a road runner.
One in the sameFor some more gory details, here you go:
Backstory:
As I previously mentioned, Chicharito is a play off of his father's nickname. The little pea comes quite the distinguished footballing heritage, with a grandfather and a father who both played professionally. And his maternal grandfather, making him 100% genetically destined for greatness. Tomás Balcázar, his grandfather, was a member of the legendary Guadalajara team that 8 out of 10 titles in the mid-50s to 60s and represented Mexico internationally. His father, Chicharo, or Javier Hernández Gutiérrez by more formal definitions, was his reserve side manager at Guadalajara, and actually quit this past summer when denied leave to watch his son at the World Cup. Anyways, Chicharo was capped 28 times for Mexico and played at the 1986 World Cup and had a distinguished career in Mexican football, most notably for Tecos.
Oh I'm sorry, I forgot to mention the actual young player didn't I?
Without much further ado, he is a product of the club of his grandfather (Guadalajara for those without good attention spans) and has played there for his entire career prior to the Mancs. He moved his way up the ranks, jumping from the lower division teams up to the big leagues. He missed out on the Mexico U17 Team that won the 2005 U17 World Cup due to injury but was in Canada for the U20 World Cup where Mexico...did not medal. Sorry I have to get my digs in. Anyways, his goalscoring record in Mexico was pretty suspect until the last couple of years (rather expected for his age) and finished joint-third top in the 2009 Apertura and is (still) leading the current Bicentenario with 10 goals in 11 appearances. His scoring record for the senior team is formidable, with 9 goals in his 16 appearances.
YouTube Evidence
Haiku
Baby-faced striker
Soon to replace CR7
As eyebrow model
Probable Role
Striker depth isn't great at the Field of Dreams lately, particularly with the lack of support for Berbatov. If Berba can't turn it around early this year, expect Chicharito to get his fair share of chances, particularly in the early-round cup ties and relegation-fodder EPL matches. If he can prove as prolific there, expect him to supplant Berbatov in the hearts and minds of Mancs by season's end.
Torres Makes Me Very Very Very Happy
Look, it was a hard year to be a Fernando Torres fan. He was showing a dangerous propensity for being crocked, and struggled (to put it lightly) in this World Cup. I've always been a big Torres fan, back from when he was the Flag of Atleti, and needless to say I was over the moon when he was signed by Liverpool. He has clearly not disappointed, when healthy, and it is hard to remember that after such a miserable last campaign. When I was bombarded by thousands of transfers rumors involving El Nino, I began to accept them. When I heard 80 million pounds to City, all I could think about was rebuilding the team and what if he stays crocked? I had my doubts, because the tabloids had convinced me he was leaving. In the end though, it's great to have him back. I'm already talking myself into a front four of Cole, Gerrard, Aquilani and Torres that will lift Liverpool to overdue glory! So, in short, welcome back Fernando and YNWA.
If he signs for Chelsea or City before September, I will shoot someone.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Cherundolo Captain at Hannover
Steve Cherundolo, who has put in a stellar twelve seasons with Hannover 96, has been named team captain for next year. I'm not fact-checking myself, but I believe the only other American to be named captain of a Bundesliga side is Claudio Reyna with Wolfsburg (where he amazingly did it while on loan). Cherundolo has always been a class act and consummate professional, who once declined a move to Bolton to stay a one-club man. He has actually stated he loves nothing more than being a player who can find a fan following who appreciates him and then stay, no matter what possibly greener pastures lie elsewhere, with that club. It couldn't happen to a better guy and professional, and best of luck to Hannover 96 this coming season.
Barca Could Face Fine If Messi Doesn't Play
Barcelona is in South Korea right now, and in true MLS fashion, they are playing a friendly against the K-League All-Stars. Now, while American fans were thrilled to see any Man U players (and I'm sure many Houstonians were thrilled to see Chicharito), Barca could face a 200,000Euro fine if Messi does not play 30 minutes tomorrow. I'm sure this was in the print somewhere, but this is rather absurd. I can understand the South Koreans desire to see arguably the best player in the world at least make a cameo, but this is one part of the money-grubbing side of football that really rubs me the wrong way. Obviously he's very well-paid for his troubles, but this has a distinct "DANCE MONKEY DANCE" feel to it. Yet again, these games are purely for Barca to make cash that they (apparently so desperately) need, but still, this is all going to look pretty stupid if some overzealous South Korean snaps his ankle off.
Bored with terrestial dominance, Messi moves to the sea
Messi (and his lovely lady) doing a little R+R swimming with the Dolphins.
Marquez Joins Red Bull-olution
Rafa Marquez has joined the New York Red Bulls, definitively proving that the MLS is apparently good enough for all squad/bench players of Barcelona. Vaya Bojan! Apparently, Henry and Marquez drew the short straw compared to Yaya Toure's mega-money signing with City, but regardless, it is quite a coup for a team that just last year was a total and utter joke, but in the dynamic world of MLS, NYRB are now in 2nd in the East, and just happened to add some world-class talent to their side. I know I wrote a rather negative account of Henry's move, but I am big enough to admit I might be overly-negative. Instead of slowly losing their grip on dominance, and fading dimmer and dimmer into the limelight, a shell of their former selves, maybe stars will now play for a big, final payday in the States while they are still at 80% of their powers. This is not complaining; this is progress! I remember hearing in an interview Drogba entertaining the idea, and while I wouldn't believe it then, why not now? One thing that cannot be escaped is that for very rich people, the good ole US of A is not too shabby. Perhaps due in part to the relative anonymity they can receive here, but I feel like in a large percentage of stories I read about player vacations, they vacation here. Cristiano Ronaldo with the LA Galaxy? After Portugal's ignominous exit from the 2018 World Cup, COUNT ON IT. That's right. Take that to the bank.
Could this be a random blip, soon to be forgotten? Perhaps. But I honestly believe the tide is turning. I lived in Barcelona for 6 months, which was enough time for all of Barcelona to convince me that Henry was, in fact, a washed-up has-been. This is probably wrong. Even so, has-been Henry is still a lot better in-his-prime Buddle. And Marquez is better than Goodson, even in a decade. So, we're becoming a way for players to leave on top in Europe, and continue playing the game they love, in front of thousands of fans while being paid comparable salaries to back home (they are DP's after all, not squad-MLSers). The competition is good, and they might even have to break a sweat to win some trophies. But most importantly, everyone in Europe is starting to know some MLS. Every football fan in Europe now knows TWO MLS teams. As I said, this is not complaining. This is progress.
Monday, August 2, 2010
Dani Alves is just happy to be here
Barca kicks off their Asian tour, and Dani Alves could not be more excited:
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