A Look Back At The Season (Transfer Season That Is)

Well, the transfer is officially shut, though apparently those sort of deadlines don't mean much in North London. Obviously, almost all of the transfer talk is of the eleventh hour of Andrei Arshavin, but in reality, I think he may be the most inconsequential big-name transfer to be made in the Premiership. In terms of real impact, I don't see Arsenal catching Villa with this latest signing, especially considering their respective coup of Emilie Heskey. But before I spoil anything, lets analyze what these moves realistically mean for each club.

Andrei Arshavin
Arsenal (Zenit St. Petersburg, Undisclosed)

Well, lets start with the big one shall we? Before we delve into this from every possible dramatic angle, lets just look at the technical aspect. Arsenal needed help in the "enforcer" department. The fact they trail Aston Villa is every Englishman's dream: a gutty, strong team full of hard-nosed players is five points clear of a team full of flighty foreigners who are upended by a strong breeze, and offer their greatest resistance to their own teammates (see Gallas, William). I don't think Arshavin changes that. He's a genius on the ball, and maybe a little over-hyped, but he'll still be a very effective attacking player in the Premier League. He succeeded at Euro08, and the only reason he hadn't left Russia sooner was the large sums of money he was getting from Zenit. However, I don't think Arshavin will help Arsenal in their fundamental quest for strength, and while much of the Arsenal attack has been rendered toothless by the injuries to Fabs, Walcott and Rosicky, I don't think Arshavin covers up enough holes, and I predict Arsenal still finishes fifth. In the long run, it's a good signing. While Wenger will have a crowded midfield for sure, a healthy Arsenal looks to be overflowing with talent. Fabs, Walcott, Adebayor, Van Persie, Nasri, Arshavin, Eduardo (he's on his way back!), Rosicky and lest our forget Wenger's Wonderboys coming up the ranks such as Jack Wilshere. The future is bright for Arsenal, but Andrei won't deliver them Champions League football this year, and in the long run, will probably be sold in a few years, being not as coveted as Wenger's own homegrown products, and effectively filling the same role around 20 other Arsenal players like to play.

Emilie Heskey
Aston Villa (Wigan Athletic, £3.5m)

Hmm, considering that Arsenal paid most likely 20m for a player they already have five of, spending 3.5m on a striker who is reliable and effective in the Premier League seems like quite good business. Liverpool was expecting to have Heskey fall into their laps for free this summer, but last time I checked, too good to be true applies equally to football as everything else. While Liverpool throws another 15m into the pot, a forceful forward who seems like he'd be a natural complement to Torres slips through the cracks. But regardless, this is not Liverpool's transfer, it is Villa's and congratulations to them. They are proven themselves to be amongst the best-run clubs in England, and when contrasted to the spend-happy and illogical Spurs, they seem like a much more likely candidate to upset the Big Four oligarchy that has ruled football for the much of this past decade, and with a few exceptions, most of the history of the Premier League. Heskey gives them a great goal-scorer who will fit into their no-frills mode of good football, and Emilie will be wearing Champions League patches on his shirts this autumn.

Ricardo Quaresma
Chelsea (Inter Milan, Loan)

Speed and stepovers, two S's that will give you infinite chances in football. Now, that's rather unfair on Quaresma, but at the end of the day, he has only played well in Portugal, and not even particularly for Portgual. And while many players can't replicate their club form for country (see England 1966-present), it's hard to be considered elite if they can't replicate their lower league form with the big boys. While he has shone in Porto and Benfica, he has flopped at Barca and Inter. Mourinho must have enough faith in him to not sell him, or maybe the right offer wasn't received. I can't say I can see him having a great impact with Chelsea. He failed to make an impact in La Liga and Serie A, why will he suddenly storm down the wings of the Premiership? And more so, if Jose Mourinho couldn't get anything out of him, how the hell will a man who has shown himself to be in every way his inferior in Scolari get anything out of him? There are too many question marks, and considering the pressure will be immense for a player who is historically not of the thickest skin, this may prove to be the last flop before Quaresma returns to Portugal for good.

Jermaine Defoe, Robbie Keane
Tottenham Hotspur (Portsmouth, £15m), (Liverpool, Undisclosed)

You might be wondering why I would place these two transfers, from different clubs and in different weeks, together. Well, they're the same transfer. And they'll have the same result as before. Thirteen months ago, these players were both playing for Tottenham, both left for a while and now both are back. I'd say both players shouldn't be blamed for wanting to transfer. Defoe wasn't getting playing time and still didn't even want to leave, but was sold when the club made it clear he was no longer needed. Keane got an offer from his dream club, and was given the chance at Trophies that aren't named Carling. Fast-forward a year, and Defoe was able to engineer his way back home, using his prolific form on the South coast into a doubling of his supposed transfer value (what recession?) and Keane is coming back to Tottenham with his tail between his legs, humbled by the "rotation" policy of Rafa that seemed to do a great job of rotating him out, but not a particularly good one of rotating him back in. The last year of both these players are worthy of their own articles, so I won't delve much further, but at the end of the day, we've seen this from Tottenham before. Keane and Defoe do not play well together, and this will not change considering their recent hiatuses from London. When you have two players who look like they're filming for Little People, Big World, you're in hot water. And of all teams to add an undersized player, Tottenham may be the worst. So now, 'Arry Houdini is going to have to figure out to play Bent, Pavs, Defoe and Keane. Hmmm, four strikers vying for two places? Defoe and Keane can't play together so one of them is inevitably going to be dropped, hopefully (for Tottenham's sake) one of them can strike up a partnership with Pavs or Bent (I'd bet Pavs and Keane), leading to two unhappy strikers languishing on the pine and fueling transfer speculation all over the club, and suddenly Tottenham is a mess of a clubhouse, trying to figure who can score goals and who they can make money on, and trying to keep themselves above water while they're on the back pages every day. God, that sounds awfully familiar doesn't it?

James Beattie
Stoke City (Sheffield United, £3.5m)

What a whirlwind career for Beattie, and while he is definitely Premiership quality, you have to say the former England International has had quite the wild ride. While I don't think Fabio Capello will be giving him a call anytime soon, he'll have all of Stoke in ecstasy as he, and fellow newcomer Etherington, keep Stoke City in the Premiership. Their home form is already enviable, and with a real goalscorer up front, their strong defensive style coupled with a few goals here and there will be more than enough to survive this 13 horse relegation race. Great business for Stoke, and while every year will be a challenge for this small club, the signing of Beattie is a great step towards making sure it's a challenge they'll have the opportunity to meet next year.

The Man City Boys
Shay Given (Newcastle United, £6m), Craig Bellamy (West Ham United, £14m), Nigel De Jong (Hamburg SV, Undisclosed)

So, the absolutely batshit crazy, the spend-crazy insane club that is Manchester City spent their entire transfer window threatening to throw entire nation's GDPs at players and ended up...making rather sensible moves at somewhat inflated prices. While the De Jong signing has been routinely mocked for his buyout clause, but considering what happened to Liverpool when they waited for a player, it's not as much of a joke anymore. 14 for Craig "Five Iron Frenzy" Bellamy is rather steep, but if they have the money, I'd say he's not much worse in quality than Defoe (though I'd assume MUCH worse for team chemistry, poor Riise ran all the way to Rome) so the deal isn't that bad. And Given is a steal at that price, which more than makes up for it. Given is one of the most underrated keepers in the world, as he kept two rather awful sides in Newcastle and Ireland in many matches they should be out of. I should note I mean no disrespect to my home nation, but when your team is full of headcases who can't handle a little jabbing (see Dunne, Richard) and then needs the full 90 minutes to beat San Marino 2-1, lets just say we could use a little shakeup. Back to City, and to be honest, these are all signings that will serve them well. If Bellamy is playing there in two years, I'll be shocked, but he gives them the goals for now and that's what they needed. If City can push into a place in Europe, that might be enough to show possible transfers that they're serious about becoming a top club. And when their Champions League days do eventually come, Given surely has the quality to still be there, and all I've seen of De Jong is encouraging, so he may survive as well. After spending a month profoundly mocked for their outlandish attempts at players who didn't even know Manchester had two premiership teams, it's rather ironic that they were able to have a very effective January, for today and tomorrow.

Jimmy Bullard
Hull City (Fulham, £5m)

A great move for everyone involved. Bullard was itching to move, and while Fulham doesn't need the money badly like some of the London neighbors, they were able to get a decent sum for him. And Hull City, desperate for anything to click after their amazing start, just got themselves a match-winning midfielder who has some experience in great escapes. Fulham looks rather safe right now, but then again, everyone was saying Hull City at the very least had insured their safety by October, and many many losses later it looks like they're in very hot water. Both sides don't look like they'll be world-beaters anytime soon, and relegation will be a legitimate fear for the foreseeable future, so while Fulham looks safe this year and Bullard may save Hull, Fulham could miss him quite dearly as soon as next year. Hull City will either get great performances from Bullard for years to come, or they'll hopefully ride him into another Premier League season and sell him for profit this summer. Win-win if you ask me.

The Real Madrid Boys
Klass-Jan Huntelaar (Ajax Amsterdam,€20m), Lassanna Diarra (Portsmouth, €20m), Julien Faubert (West Ham United, Loan)

Note: Not sure if any of those players are any of these three. Anyways, I have mixed feelings about these signings. Diarra is a world-class player, and we all knew from the moment he signed for Portsmouth that it would be short-lived. I think he'll be a real difference maker, and while Huntelaar is a class player, he might just be another Dutch player who is a goal machine in Holland but flames out in the big leagues. He's a poor man's Van Nistelrooy at best, and while most players would love to have that moniker, it's one he'll have to earn. I wasn't overly impressed with his international performances, and Michael Bradley ripped the Dutch league apart last year, so I'm reserving judgment for now. I think Faubert is just going to be a bench player, or at best be a non-negative. I just don't understand his hype, as a team that's fighting relegation didn't feel like he was an automatic choice. Maybe papers are slow in Madrid, as they were also chasing another player who would ride their pine in Jermaine Pennant. Don't expect Real to splash out the cash to keep him at the Bernabeu. Diarra will prove to be a great signing, and Huntelaar does have the ability to be a world-class poacher, but that's something that remains to be seen. All that's for sure is, this is a club that doesn't have a snowball's chance in hell of catching Barca.

Carlo Cudicini
Tottenham Hotspur (Chelsea, Free)

Alright, well this is the last transfer I'll cover. Obviously there were other moves, Diouf switched one club in distress for another, and remained highly overrated throughout the entire process, and then there were plenty of players from lower leagues who moved their way up, but to be honest I don't know enough about them to accurately report. But enough about whom I'm not writing about, and more onto Carlo Cudicini. I've lambasted Tottenham for their rather dodgy transfer policies in the past, but I really can't say anything negative here. They have a shaky goalkeeper, who has weeks where he looks like Schmichael reincarnated (hyperbole) and others where he looks like he's training for hot potato with his kids that night. Cudicini is a world-class keeper, and is one of the stayovers from Chelsea's "two World Class players at every position" policy that Abramovich seems to have abandoned as of late (as a supporter of a club who claims to have title aspirations while having the useless Lucas as an often-used substitute, lets say I have little sympathy). Considering that Daniel Levy didn't even have to open his purse to buy him (which I'm sure was quite bizarre for the poor man, he must have burnt a hole in every pocket of every pant he owns). It very well may be Cudicini's saves and not Keane or Defoe's goals that keeps Tottenham in the top flight, and he is the type of keeper you can build a defense around. The wonder is how low-profile this move is compared to the far less consequential moves of Quaresma and Flaubert.